The Orkut profile.

Al rite i am a self confessed Orkut addict, i love to roam from profile to profile and check out what the gals scrapped the guy and vice versa. I love to check out totally random guys and their pics.

And the more profiles i see the more i wonder what is the point people try to prove using their profiles. They range from downright stupid to weird and ..

Take for example the solo pictures guys put on their main introductory page.
Some people put real dude types pics with goggles or displaying biceps or on a harley davidson or simply smiling 19 to the dozen.
My heart really goes out to these people wondering exactly what type of gals they will be able to attract using Orkut. (That is their primary purpose i assume)

Then there are the people who use their names as constant status updates...

XYZ will be back to India on So and so date, or ABC.. hhmm enjoying first snowfall.

Dudes if any of you reading that has a name like this, any one who needs to know your travel plans will just ask you and if you need to broadcast your interests well thats just pathetic.

Its bad enough that people post their telephone numbers in their names, as if the whole world just needs to know their numbers and cant wait to read the number posted inside the profile.

Then, I bet you've seen this
Place:- Bombay> Bangalore> Paris> San Francisco California.
As if it isn't bad enough that Orkut makes you fill in your birth place and current location separately in your profile these guys need to advertise every single place they have ever been to. Dudes get a life.

The funniest are guys (and gals are guilty of this too) who post their personal intimate romantic pictures on their Orkut albums, (and then you say Orkut is full of stalkers). People will pull all stops to put their marriage pics or honeymoon pics on their public albums. The last (and one i am guilty of myself) are ppl who put nature pics, ie mountains seas and forests as if they are all Columbuses' reborn.

Dont even get me started on About me's and passions, i have seen everything from
Looks no less than a Movie star to Passionate about making girlfriends.

Hmmm I could do this forever, visiting profiles i mean not writing ;-)

Giggling Girls!

The context:-
Me saying good bye to my Bhua as i step out of their home at the university housing complex. A strange giggling voice fills the corridor as if a thousand girls have suddenly found something very funny.

Bhua:- Uh Oh its the Giggling Girls (GG)
Me:- Huh whats that.
Bhua:- Bunch of College girls mainly studying nursing and living in local hostels.
Me:- Hmm Nurses...
Bhua:- Arre tum bachke rehna these gals drink a lot on weekends and have been known to create a nuisance.
Phupaji:- Arre kyuun dara rahi ho, atleast he has a better chance, let him enjoy, those gals are fun
Bhua:- (Experience se keh rahen hain)

By this time i see one of them wearing mini's and a shining top and giggling away 9 to 11. Does this girls have st vitus' dance or what. By now I am reasonably scared and walk as slowly as possible to the lift giving them enough time to close the door. As i hear their demented shrieks descend i am reasonably certain i have seen the last of them...

But whats this i hear them rising again, the girls just took the lift down for fun and now they are coming back up.I'm not sure what for! I swallow and nervously press the lift button. Reasoning after all what could a bunch of college gals do to harm me. I take my wallet and put it in my jacket pocket.

The door opens to a medley of colors, mellifluous chirping and the strong smell of alcohol. Looking around nervously (which i do very well) I manage to enter the lift without once letting my gaze meet theirs.

I can count 7-8 pair of heels and a million smirks. I feel as if they are all gazing at the new found bakra... Twitching i look up to see mostly oriental features, 2 of them at least 6 feet but thankfully the rest much smaller.

I try to give a benign smile to no one in particular hoping they will take this as a sign of boldness and back off. But no one seems to notice and certainly no one reciprocated.

At the ground i hurry to the nearby muni (San Fransisco local train) stop, the gals waver just a bit seeing they would each need to cough up $1.50 to entrain behind me. I never waited for a train so frantically wondering why the hell didn't the gals go back to their old game of up an down on the elevator. Maybe they had to go somewhere too!

I see them from the corner of my eye collecting all the loose change they have and all the while talking in some strange foreign language. From what i could get they had only $3.00 between them which meant only 2 of them could enter the train. Thanks god i decide, once again prematurely.I notice i have left my bag on the seat while buying the ticket and the gigglers have surrounded it leaving me no choice but to go close to them.

When i try to excuse myself towards the bag the gals seem to concentrate near my point of entry supposedly chatting excitedly in their own language and not stopping giggling even for a second.

Now, I am in panic thinking is this a game, how do i get my bag. I am all alone in the cold at 10 in the night with these nut cases. In a state of daze i hear the incoming train approaching. Feeling exactly what Abhimanu must have felt like while entering the ChakraVhuya. I decide to physically shove one of the gals and retrieve my bag..

Scarcely have i touched her that she recoils back in horror as if i have molested her looking hurt. I mumble my apologies at which the gang bursts into fits of laughter.

Being surrounded by drunk gals may seem like a scene straight from my fantasies but then i just duck my way out clutching on to my bag like a trophy.
I run and enter the train, cherishing the warmth within. But alas now the one i had touched enters the train behind me with a grimace on her face. She is soon joined by the rest of her gang. Wow! now a bunch of gals has hopped on a train without tickets just to chase me, i flatter myself.. Talk about nuisance!

Why does this frickin country have so many trains and so few people that i am again all alone on the train coach now . I desperately try to look as innocent and naive as possible. What if the gal calls the cops saying i assaulted her. But then i reason she is so drunk that the cop would probably arrest her first.

The hawks keep closing in on their prey, then one of them gives a discreet smile and pulls out a smoke. Her pal pokes her in the ribs pointing to the no smoking sign and i am spared the ignominy of having to inhale smoke.

After 10 minutes of loneliness finally the train reaches its destination and i jump out and reach for the Interstate train. The girls still hot on my heals!
Thankfully as i enter the platform gates a TT finally checks my ticket and lets me through.
Behind me i hear the oh so delicious words "Tickets please" and some confused babbling.

I look behind to see them waving heir hands and shaking their faces at me and i so wish i had a camera with me then, but the pic above comes pretty close to what they looked like.

Moral of the story.. never drink it makes you do things you would never do otherwise!